“Obama-black”

Written by: A-Man

It has become common place to tell youth to “be themselves” in almost any given situation. “Be yourself. Seemingly genuine people will get to know the real you and like you all the better for it. Be yourself.” I can’t count how many times I must have heard that growing up. While this may sound like good advice, it is an unrealistic ideal in the Black experience.

Gross stereotyping and prejudice plague the professional workplace, just as they do every other American institution and facet of life. As a minority, you are told to be yourself, and taught that there is a necessary amount of assimilation required in order to succeed in this country. In many instances, these standards are appropriate. For example, it is only fitting that members of all races are required to follow necessary workplace etiquette in order for business to be conducted effectively. On the other hand, these standards can also undermine cultural diversity and belittle those that don’t belong to the dominant group. This being the case, for minorities in the workplace it is almost impossible to be “yourself.”

I’ve discussed this with numerous friends and colleagues and have noted that the rampant ignorance of the majority to how racist they really are is perhaps the largest contributing factor to this. How often do you police your vernacular when at work, tirelessly attempting to avoid using any form of slang? How often have you discussed current events, only to regret it when the discussion turns the recent double homicide of black teens in urban area? Have you ever avoided commenting on a subject because you knew the response would probably necessitate some type of explanation in order for the white people at work to really “feel you”? Have you ever said I feel you, to anyone not of color on the job?

Being black has always been difficult in America. I am not saying we should go to work in baggy suits with sagging pants and big bright fedoras and feathers. I am not saying that we should sell gum and office supplies by the water cooler, or fulfill whatever unfortunate stereotype may come to mind. Ignorant – or what many have affectionately termed “ghetto” – is not black and I don’t believe that is who black people really ARE. I do, however, believe that black people are not able to truly express their views, opinions, and beliefs in the office for fear of becoming the pariah. Why do I have to be the ambassador of Blackness? Why do I have to explain how the black community feels every time there’s a Jena Six or a Sean bell? Or how the treatment of Katrina victims, or black youth in the criminal justice system is systematically racist and just another example of how America views African Americans in this country, without sounding like the angry black guy? Why can’t I comment on the Reverend Wright debacle and actually agree with SOME of the things this man said, and furthermore explain that even though I’m not in complete agreement, I understand why a 75-year-old Black man and veteran of war would be so skeptical and suspicious of his government (Tuskegee experiment, anyone?)?

I think a lot of the issues stem from a lack of understanding, as well as the media’s portrayal of African Americans in this country. Not to misplace responsibility, but the fact that every Black person in a Big Mac commercial is rapping about the special sauce doesn’t really do much to portray the beauty and intelligence of our community.

I had a discussion earlier this week. A friend of mine was telling me about how a co-worker told him he was “Barack-Obama black,” as if it were a completely acceptable statement. When my friend gave him the confused look, the coworker went on to explain that what he meant was he was “good black” and not like “Flavor Flav or the ghetto people on TV.” WOW! It’s stuff like this that makes you want to get ignorant and straight smack people upside they damn head in the office.

How do you guys feel about this? Does anyone have any stories they’d like to share? Holla back, or if you’re in the workplace, please respond in a timely manner.

Tags: Style | May 13, 2008 |

13 Comments, Comment or Ping

TROUBLMan

I don’t know what it is but I’ve always had the gift of making white people like me. Maybe it’s the fact that I know how to “speak so well.” Maybe it’s because I know when to laugh at their jokes. Or maybe it’s because I’m not Wesley-Snipes-dark… Who knows. Regardless, I try my hardest to be myself.

I was 10 when i realized what a token black guy was. Being the only black player on an all white soccer team changed my life. Of course I knew white people, but not until then did I visit a white person’s home, listen to “white music,” eat “white food,” etc.

Funny, because when I was that age that’s how I described things, “white people food, white sports, white music.”

The experience changed my life because it opened my mind and made my world bigger. While the homies were “keeping it real” in the hood, I would be traveling to different soccer tournaments, camps and events. I was at wine and cheese parties, I was listening to rock and roll. And after it was all said I done, I was back in the hood myself.

Yeah, I got ridiculed for playing a “white sport” with white boys but I didn’t care. I was fortunate because I realized I was learning to play the game. We all know what game I’m talking about–the get-in-where you-fit-in game that helps you succeed later in life. Yes, there were time when I had to compromise my slang, I had to tuck in my shirt and I had to stomach corny jokes, but through it all, I never lost myself. In fact, I became more of myself– a man of the world, who loves all people and new experiences.

[Reply]
"A Mom" reply on May 13, 2008 10:49 pm:
That’s what it is all about. And now here you are a real TROUBLMAN.
Do you think you would be here today without those experiences?
I to was involved at a young age with my music. I was taking classical voice lessons and singing opera music. That was not the norm in my black community. I was in a lot of competitions where I was the only black person on the bill. I was in a all Asian band with my brother as well as a totally mixed band that traveled all around the country. But this made my world bigger and I was able to see thing from different eyes and still be the person I am today. I think I passed that on to my children.

[Reply]
RBT

Damn you said it bruh-bruh I grew up playing hockey (imagine a nigga from the Bay playing hockey, it don’t snow in Cali). I started playing when I was 7 there were actually a lot of black people on the team but still predominately white you should have seen some of the reactions when our motley crew walked through the doors of some of those suburban ice palaces trying to holler at those snow bunnies. I realized then that white people are people too. That’s one of the huge problems is that when a person grows up without interacting with people of different races they don’t seem real. They seem like mythical creatures that you hear about on TV or now the internet. Then I went to a predominately white High school that was in the heart of East Oakland which if your familiar with the area you know is a complete irony within itself. There I met hella cool ass white people. Later in life I went to college in Boston when I was there I lived in Cambridge 2 blocks away from Harvard where I was to infiltrate those Ivy League gates and begin to figure out ways to achieve my spot in that tax bracket that I want to be in. The whole time never compromising myself to flurish in any of those environments as a matter of fact being a smart ass ghetto ass Nigga that has always been comfortable around people in general made them love me even more. So my advice to people is to always be yourself and always be smart about it. If you use slang because that is the best way for you to express yourself than express yourself but be talking about something.

[Reply]
Boosy

that’s whats up right there…..

[Reply]
"A Mom"

It’s hard to realize when you are being yourself. I think I try to be myself around most people but I sometime listen to myself at work, and I question is that really me or just the person I am around certain people.
One thing I know about the real me is that I don’t look at anyone as different. The president of the company to the janitor, mailman/woman, etc. I treat them all the same no one is better than the other, and that is real to me.

[Reply]
Q.

good post..

i knew it was time to leave working for someone and starting my own agency when my boss told me that i should be happy with my place in life.. he didn’t mean to be racist in his remarks, but he was.. we had just come back from securing a large pharma client earlier that day.. as we were headed back to the office, he started to give me “mentor” advice.. he told me that at my age, i was living the life.. i should have been happy with being one of the few young Black males (shoot, Blacks period) in my industry, getting paid a nice salary.. that if i kept it up, i would have his job (President) in the future..

my mentality, at that point, was different.. i held the company down for the most part.. so i felt they should be lucky having me on the squad.. i didn’t feel i was getting paid what i deserved, because they hired 3 ppl and gave them titles that were above mine, and paid them more.. even though i managed the largest clients, and had a smaller support team.. so for me, i had to use it as motivation.. i stepped out 2 months afterwards and never looked back..

but overall, i was always the token Black guy.. knew it going into the situation.. in one situation, there were 2 of us.. but he became the token Black guy that they asked the borderline racist questions to.. they knew not to ask me the same questions.. i’m not sure why or how they knew, but they just did.. i always found that interesting..

[Reply]
"A Mom" reply on May 14, 2008 11:54 am:
Q,

I know how you feel. My mamager would tell me the same thing. Especially when I would request the job let me take classes to further my skills on the job. She would say things like. “I don’t think those are skills you need for your job”. I would have to go over her head. I think she was jealous because she was stuck in a nowhere job.

[Reply]
TROUBLdMami

This topic I relate to so well…I am of mixed heritage, so its interesting, because on one side of the coin I can be in the “white world”…I have had the opportunity to go to conferences, take advanced placement classes, travel, played sports,experience life outside of what I knew or was comfortable with…So, taking that into the workplace, I am familiar with what other nationalities may like or dislike…However, there are times I feel inadequate at work, because I may come into work, and its just one of those days that I don’t feel like speaking and automatically, “Oh! She has an attitude…” But, if it was someone else of a different background its not considered an attitude if they do not speak in the morning…Why is that?

[Reply]
TROUBLMan reply on May 31, 2008 9:10 am:
Who you kiddin’? Don’t act like you don’t have an attitude.

[Reply]
TROUBLdMami

Also…this may be a little off topic… but while struggling with being yourself in the white world…I have had my trials with not being black enough in the black community…

[Reply]
Lag

I have had very interesting experiences in my life with pretty much the exact opposite: I am a white girl who has lived in mostly black neighborhoods for years. First I lived in the Bronx near Fordham for years, and now I live in Hamilton Heights in Harlem. Almost all my neighbors are black. It’s difficult to know how to “be myself” in my neighborhood because I am never sure what people might find offensive. I try to just be authentic in my conversation and not let myself get tripped up with slang or anything, but I find myself watching what I say and how I act so much that I end up NOT being myself. The worst part of this is that then I start to feel silly and end up not even talking to anyone, which makes me seem like “the snobby white girl” on the block!

[Reply]
KP

Listen, it’s easy for black folk to get caught up in the everyday criticisms, analyzing every commercial and comment out of the white man’s mouth. Lets not forget that no matter where you’re from, the people who are most versatile adapt to all environments. Notice I said ‘adapt,’ and not ‘assimilate.’ They’re the same thing. Black folk have this thing against the word assimilate. I don’t blame you. When I hear the word, I immediately think about acting white, acting unlike myself, straight corniness. But adapting to your environment, whether it be at work, with your girlfriends friends, or in another country trying to communicate with people who don’t know you from adam or eve, is a tool, like a secret weapon, that you use to not stick out, to be liked, fit in, or accepted wherever you are. If I’m in China, and I try to speak chinese, I try to eat chinese food, or I try to wear chinese people clothes, one may say I’m assimilating. Or, you can say I’m adapting to their culture. Adapting is something that I can do to make them feel more comfortable, letting them know that I’m a normal person, I’m human, and I can communicate and respond to communication on their level. They see me as equal. Not to mention that getting them to like me enables me to get what I need from them. So be careful when you sit there and say, you can’t be yourself, or you find yourself holding back from speaking slang around white people. When you grow up, and you interact in the professional world, there is no room for slang or immature talk. Grow up, be a grown man, speak like a professional. You wanna talk gangsta, go hang out on the block. When your in a professional, or foreign setting (by foreign, I mean something unfamilar, not necessarily another country) act accordingly, don’t call it assimilation, or being out of your element. Maybe your element isn’t mature enough to adapt. Troublman, you’re a chameleon. You’ve adapted to your situations. It’s as clear as night and day. This is a white world, but only to the extent you let it be. White people don’t run shit the way the used to in the 70’s 80’s and 90’s. I want black folk to step up and realize that stepping into a situation and speaking a certain way, or acting a little different then how you would act if you was on the block, isn’t always assimilation. It’s adaptation. Even if you was in a room of black intellectuals, you would have to switch your style up, and speak like you got a head on your shoulders. You’re not corny for that, you can still be gangsta. Just an educated gangsta. Finish the movie next time, you’ll see that most gangsta’s, given all their flaws, actually were incredibly intelligent.

[Reply]
TROUBLdMami reply on May 17, 2008 4:11 pm:
I agree…adapt and assimilate are similar…For instance, Oprah got where she is because she is able to adapt/assimilate, and many times I hear how she “sold out”…With that said, I believe there is a certain economic status issue invovled and it seems when one attains that, then they are “selling out”…That type of thought process will get you nowhere, except still complaining about the next person “selling out”…

[Reply]

TROUBL

“Obama-black”

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