TROUBL

1. TROUBLMan

   SB

   At what moments do you feel loneliest? If you tell us that “a person can be constantly surrounded by people and feel as alone as someone on a deserted island,” what is it inside of you that makes you feel separate.

   What more important to you, feeling connected or companionship? In my eyes they’re two different things. Do you differentiate the two? And if so, what’s the difference?

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2. *SB*

   damn troublman…talk about calling a sista out!!

   i cant really pin point what makes a person feel seperate…it can be a multitude of things…i was looking for clarification on this as well..

   I also cant choose between connections and companionship…although there is nothing like having a companion which i define as a lover/boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/partner…feeling connected (friends or having people in your life that relate and support you) is always comforting and when there is no companion- you fall back on your connections even more…so in my opinion there is no one over the other…i think everyone deserves both….but yes they are different…

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3. Talisman

   Interesting subject. What defines “alone”? I think its a personal thing. That person who’s alone in a crowd could be an “outsider” or the “leader” of the crowd (leaders can feel very alone sometimes). As for friendship, family, and/or companionship, in regards to loneliness, that’s another thing. Relationships come & go, especially in these fluid times of instant gratification & partners fleeing a relationship at the first sign of it requiring “work”. My “blood” family & I no longer communicate and I feel no loss; the reason being that my friends are my family. So, I think I would feel very alone and lonely if I did not have them in my life. My mom told me a long time ago, friendship is a precious thing to be treasured and appreciated. As usual, she was soooo right! LOL!

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4. TROUBLMan

   SB

   Choose!!!

   To me, I’d enjoy feeling connected. There are people who I’ve never met, people who are dead, people who visit this site and I only know their screen name and I feel connected to them. SHOUTS TO ALL MY TROUBLMAKERS!!!

   You never answered what inside you makes you feel alone?

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5. *SB*

   Talisman…
   You brought up a really good point…i could imagine how a leader could feel alone but at the same time I find it ironic….its ironic to me because the person that represents and leads the people feels disconnected from them at the same time…

   Troublman…
   well…when you put it like that i agree…connections are always great…they bring more oppurtunities, more fun and i love meeting new people…plus connections can relate and support you….when all else fails…connections are what hold you up…so if I HAVE to choose…its the connections!!!

   As far as what makes me feel alone…im really not sure…I have a feeling that its the experience of knowing that a deeper and more fulfilling situation is out there for me and I have yet to find it…it makes me feel lost sometimes…its like not being satisfied with my current situation…i guess

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6. alwayswrite

   loneliness is a negative sociological response to human beings not possessing a part of their existence. Basically, human beings are social animals and we need other social animals around us–period. loneliness is an absence of an aspect of our nature. so, yes, we are meant to be loved and in love, just as there is meant to be love. when a person is alone they say, “i don’t need anyone. i am satisfied with myself.” first of all, human beings can conditions themselves for many things. you can condition yourself to be alone-or accept being alone. and i don’t believe a person can be totally satisfied with themselves if they are alone. they are missing a part of their existence. how can they be?

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7. TROUBLMan

   SB

   if that is how you feel, are you actually lonely or are you impatient. If you KNOW that a deeper and more fulfilling situation is out there be patient and try to enhance the feelings you get from being connected. I’m a leader and when I feel alone, I make sure to remind myself that there are people depending on me, and that the connection that I build on.

   TALISMAN
   Do you consider yourself a leader? You sound like you’re speaking from experience. If so, do you agree with the connectedness that I described to SB.

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8. BIG Tone

   I like being alone. I wouldn’t call myself a very social person. I have a small circle of close friends and thats it. Being alone and feeling alone is two different things. I don’t feel alone when I am alone. I enjoy the time by myself. Maybe if you always need someone around you that means you need to work on something within yourself. I wouldn’t want to be like Tom Hanks. That shit would drive you nuts.

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9. Talisman

   Big Tone

   I like being alone as well. It gives you time to reflect and appreciate life and all it has to offer.

   Troublman

   Yeah, I definitely speak from experience. When you’re an inexperienced leader, you’re usually taught to be an island; but with experience, you can come to realize that you can cultivate fulfilling relationships with those you lead without sacrificing integrity or authority.

   As for the connectedness you described to SB, I feel that as well. For example, there is this friend I’ve only met once in person but we’ve cultivated a lasting friendship through other communications means; I consider her one of my best friends. SB brought me here and through all of the responses in certain blogs, I have a sense of the community here as well (SB & Mahlia seem a lot alike! LOL.).

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10. Jamaican Beauty

    some more good shit

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11. LovelyNicoya07

    dont feel lonely..okay.

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12. "A Mom"

    Now that my children are grown and on their own. I realize what lonely feels like. I come from a family of seven children and growing up I always had a lot of people around. After marriage and becoming a parent I always had my children. I realize now that I am entering a new adventure in my life and in this I have to find what makes me happy and how to finds ways to fill the void that I am feeling. I’m not sad in my loneliness. It’s just a new thing for me. And I do miss my children even though they are always in my life.

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13. *SB*

    troublman…
    you may be right..im probably being impatient (a characteristic of mine) and its adding to my loneliness but what doesnt kill you makes you stronger, right?

    A MOM-
    I have to agree with you….my whole life ive been surrounded by family and friends…even in undergrad i went to a neighboring college so I never really felt alone…now that i have ventured off and moved across the country I realized how lonely life without them can be so I am venturing into a new chapter in my life also…it can be exciting yet difficult at times…

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Reply to “All By Myself”

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